This was a big week for my family. My husband is back to work full-time after being off for more than a month over the holidays, we got back to all of our normally scheduled activities and I signed my baby girl up for Kindergarten. And let’s not forget we got to see all of the fabulous fashion from the Golden Globes red carpet!
I will be honest, I don’t really watch the full broadcast of the show anymore, but you know I am tuning in to see allllll the dresses and of course my girl Kristen Cavallari. #obsessed.
I will say, I saw a quote floating around facebook and felt like I wanted to discuss it with you all. It was from Glenn Close and she said this:
I’m thinking of my mom who really sublimated herself to my father her whole life and in her 80s she said to me, ‘I feel like I haven’t accomplished anything.’ And it was so not right, and I feel what I’ve learned through this whole experience is that women, we’re nurturers. That’s what’s expected of us. We have our children, we have our husbands, if we’re lucky enough, and our partners, whoever. But we have to find personal fulfillment. We have to follow our dreams. We have to say, ‘I can do that and I should be allowed to do that.’”
When I read that quote, I was like, yasssss. Glenn Close gets it!!
Here’s the thing, and I am realizing this very quickly as time is passing by. I just signed my daughter up for Kindergarten. The last 5 years flew by in an instant.
I am so grateful and lucky to have had most of that time home with her and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Knowing now that she is about to be off and running, I am finally realizing what a gift it was for me to be home with her. Hindsight truly is 20/20.
Although, I won’t lie, more days than not it was a struggle for me. I see now that the memories, the struggles and the victories are everything to me and nothing in life can take that away! It has shaped me and shaped my girls into who we are right now.
But I also know that the next 5 years, and the next 5 years after that will fly by. And my girls will grow up and spread their wings and soar just like I did. I went off to college and basically never moved back home. It is exactly what you want for your children but I will say,
It leaves me wondering, where will I end up?
As moms, we dedicate so much of ourselves to our children and our husbands and while I 100% believe that is what we should do, I also want to advocate that we can NOT forget about us. We can NOT forget about our dreams, goals and passions in life.
My whole drive to start my business was basically summed up by Glenn Close’s mom. I was feeling that way at 40 and didn’t want to lose another minute feeling lost in my life.
Can any of you relate to that feeling?
So while I want us to all be the best wives and mothers our partners and children deserve, I also want us to care and nurture ourselves. And this is so much more than practicing self care.
This is about finding your passion and a conduit for channeling your energy into something outside of you and the home.
It could be anything really. I know starting a business is not for everyone. I also recognize that not everyone will feel the same way Glenn Close’s mother did.
But my point is, I want us all to recognize this. Repeat after me:
I am ME first. I am a Wife, Mom, Boss and everything else I call myself next.
I think that’s one of the reasons I have started channeling so much energy into my fashion and outfits. I LOVE clothes and always have. It makes me feel excited and alive to look cute. It makes me feel like me. I like being extra. Always have. It’s an easy way to say this is who I am as a woman. I am Kathleen. I am me first.
So, if you need help understanding who you are and what you want to pursue in life, ask yourself the following questions:
What am I most passionate about in life outside of my family?
If I could be anything in the world, what would I be?
If there were no obstacles in my way (read: if you had time and didn’t feel the constant demands of children at every moment) what would I do?
What makes me want to do a little happy dance?
Finish this sentence: If only I could/were/did_______________________
Think about that thing you secretly have dreaming of doing and then figure out how to make it a more central part of your life.
Learning how to say I am ME first takes practice. And time. But I promise you won’t regret it.
And when you are old and gray and reflecting on all of the joy you had with your family and all the of passions you were courageous enough to pursue, I want you to remember this blog post and say I’m so glad I read it.
Because at the end of the day, that is my passion. Empowering women to believe they can do it. And then helping them get there!
And remember ladies, you’re not fully dressed until you sparkle!
